Sunday, May 3, 2009

Denial Twice Reminded

As a mirror I see myself in your eyes
I turn away as I know I'll never be ready
My shipped sailed away assailed on every side
I still believed in the possibility of hope
But it left my soul that night
While in silence I was hurting
I hung up the phone, knowing I'd never again
Begin to hope in being even just 'alright'

I know you'll never understand me
And I know I'll never again trust you
Once an ignorant harmony ruled over our lives
But an injustice brought forth the lies
Born a captive vengeance twice denied
A reasonable thing that can't be described

You told me you'd wait for me
Forever holding onto hope in a son
But why did you go behind my back
And kill every version of hope
With the betrayal of lust that night

Was it a dozen moments or just one
That you gave your body over to him
Begging of him privileges once mine
The fuck do I do while the reel keeps playing
In my head every time I lay my head down at night

I know you'll never understand me
And I know I'll never again trust you
Once an ignorant harmony ruled over our lives
But an injustice brought forth the lies
Born a captive vengeance twice denied
A reasonable thing that can't be described

I thought you were good
Turns out even that was a lie
Sure to some people your alright
But you killed the wise version of you that night
How could you expect me to turn a blind eye
When I close them again the reel plays
And I'm watching him caress you so tight

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