Test Tube Self

I came down from the scale
You sent me to judge my weight
Laughed at my 13 year old fattened carcass
Claims made amidst laughter I weighed more than you

You fed me all that fucking food
Never thought about my health
Or how the children laughed at me in school
I walked every day my 5 minutes of horror
Wondering who would throw rocks at me that day

I told you it was happening
But you always claimed a loving comparison truth
Now I see you as ill advised pacifists
Meandering away from a loving confrontation
Waiting as the vultures circle over my head
Burned my yearbooks in my bedroom
As the tears from my eyes casts fears all over

You claimed to love me
But in return I say fuck you
You called me your trial run child
And I conceded to your tests of ignorance
Am I born from an experimental test tube

I came home from school that day
Beaten with welts upon my face
Held down by three school mates
All you could bring yourself to say
Get used to a society that will ever treat me that way

16 years old struck down a second time that day
By parents who claimed to love me
But made a bargain deal with comfort
So for a second time turned a blind eye to my abuse
More than their own flesh, blood and bones
Deal with life your fucking self they say
I suppose they'll be silently watching

You claimed to love me
But in return I say fuck you
You called me your trial run child
And I conceded to tests of your ignorance
Am I born from an experimental test tube

I tell you the truth
Only a shadow remains
Of the child you once claimed you knew