(Ana) A Moment of Mercy

In better days
When love was present
I would treat myself to moments
Of acceptance then the mirror reflected
A handsome man who wasn't anorexic

It's hard to see
Past the bastard I've become
A monster of an apple who ate the tree
Who fell into ruined wounding everyone

On that better day
When love wasn't so absent
As my mirror jail's walls broke down
I saw a handsome man not an anorexic

In hindsight
It was all my fault
Dwelt too long on the shame
Prolonged the suffering of love

In my last days
I will revitalize hope for others
For me there is no redemption
Only a mirror moment of acceptance
When before me stands a man
Not a dying angel of anorexia